Suburbia
By AB
Suburbia:
We drove to your parents’ home, out in suburbia talking about all the things you wish you could change.
Like that man you see for help with your head and the way you see yourself, or the way your parents run their house.
But that’s life in suburbia; where house wives drink all day, as the husbands work for the man for just enough pay.
You told me all about all the dysfunction in the neighborhood, like Ms. Robinson’s gay son.
And the kid who used to play with guns until one day he got mad and then he got sad and then nothing at all.
But that’s life in suburbia; where the kids aren’t all right, and the parents all fight.
So we hid in your room and rocked out to all your favorite bands as we got high and dreamt of distant lands.
We talk about white flight and we stay up all night, then we do something brand new, well at least new to you…
But that’s life in suburbia; where love like ours is just so taboo and everyone pretends to know the real you.
After we’re done I give you a hug and you tell me this wasn’t just a fling and that you’d like to make us a thing.
You told me about all your secrets and I told you mine, while Kurt sang along in a high pitched whine.
But that’s life in suburbia; where the kids’ romances are built overnight as the parents struggle and sleep apart at night.
But it didn’t matter to us, as we sat together in your new car, wishing and wanting for this to go far.
But it wasn’t meant to be, or at least that’s what you told me, as you drove me home, out of your suburbia.
But that’s life in suburbia; where it’s fun to play until the end of the day…
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I really like how you told your story in a relatable way and not from a cheesy narrative. The rhyming was very good, not to overbearing while still enough to where the reader understands it is supposed to rhyme. I find that your breaking of lines to be perfect. Very nice job overall.
I love the feelings that are brought up in this poem and I’d love to read more of your work. It reminded me of the neighborhood I grew up in and the silly romances that occurred there.
This was a beautifully painful expression of the truth that resides within suburbia and the world as a whole. It was gentle, but raw and honest. Those are some of the most incredible characteristics of a poem; or at least to me. I love reading work that not only flows like poetry but that speaks to me from a variety of different directions. This did just that. Thank you so much for sharing.
Hi AB,
The theme of this poem is extremely powerful, and I found several lines that stood out to me that I really liked. The idea of a seemingly perfect society being miserable and dysfunctional behind closed doors is something that is very real, especially in the United States. The way that you were able to write this so vividly and incorporate how individuals in this society struggle while maintaining a happy, successful façade was eye-opening and very interesting to read. One line that I really enjoyed reading was “that man you see for help with your head and the way you see yourself” – this line speaks volumes to mental health in today’s youth, and I also just really like the wording. The reference to things that are stigmatized in society being ignored or ostracized, like the “dysfunction” in suburbia being the gay son, or the kid who played with guns until he eventually felt nothing wrong, was another very powerful aspect of your poem. In a perfect suburbia, I’d imagine these things are shoved down and hidden to maintain the image. The repeated line of “but that’s life in suburbia”, was another part of the poem I really liked. I love the theme of young love as an escape in this type of society, and the reality of taboo love in these societies is another powerful theme. I reread this poem a few times because the wording was beautifully done, and there were so many real, hidden aspects of life mentioned that I wanted to make sure I appreciated them all. This poem says so much about societal standards and how they ruin people’s lives; the way these parents disregard their families to uphold their appearance, the way that what they show the outside world does not match what goes on inside their homes and own heads, and I think I relate to this from my own childhood, so that may be part of the reason I love this poem so much. The ending, “But it wasn’t meant to be, or at least that’s what you told me, as you drove me home, out of your suburbia.
But that’s life in suburbia; where it’s fun to play until the end of the day” is sad, but I think it makes such a powerful point that there is a distinct line drawn between different societal groups, and that in certain societies, different types of love are taboo regardless of how strong they may be. I loved reading this poem; the topics covered, and the language used were amazing.
I love how this poem touches upon very relatable, contemporary problems people deal with – mental health, sexuality, dysfunctional family life, the judgement of others in our community – but it manipulates these topics to shed light on the subtle, fleeting respite of an ardent relationship, something beautiful that shines amid the chaos but only for a short period of time. There are a few techniques that make the lines even more impactful too: the repetition of “But that’s life in suburbia” is particularly eye-catching because each time it’s repeated, it’s given a new meaning with different context. I also adore the rhyme scheme; it pops up here and there to add emphasis to certain points being made, which is very effective. You clearly have the skills of a poet, and I can’t thank you enough for letting me read your work. Keep writing!!
I think it’s so interesting to write about suburbia, when it’s often taken for granted or considered one of the blander parts of American existence. But you included a lot of little details about what it’s like to live in the suburbs, which really helped the poem feel alive. Although this seems like a forgettable part of living, I think growing up in the suburbs really does affect a person, which is what you’ve described here.
Hi AB!
I loved this poem!! I mean it was really great it was a change of pace from other poems I have read. I’ve never read something like this before! As someone who didn’t grow up in suburbia it was really interesting to see how other people lived and grew up. This showed me that what people like me see from the outside is not a good representation of the real suburbia. I like how you added subtle hints of how mental draining it really was growing up there like Ms. Robinson’s gay son. I do wonder if what happened to him was because he was gay or mental illness, anyway. Thank you for sharing your experience with everyone but specifically me right now! You’re doing great! Don’t forget that!
AB,
Wow, I really enjoyed your poem! The imagery you create is powerful. The contrasts between young love and feuding spouses is stark. You captured the monotony of suburban life. Keep writing!
This reads like a song I’d love to hear in a minor key. Sweet, sad imagery and a lilting refrain.
You’ve really brought me back to my youth reading this. I love the way your words paint the story and how it flows. I’m so impressed by the imagery you are able to create and how you are able to express your perspective. Keep up the fantastic work, you are amazing!
This was really touching – it brought me back to moments in my teen years. The way you weaved sadness and hope throughout, leaving the reader with a sense of nostalgia and melancholy was beautiful.
This was such an emotional piece. You used your words so well and readers are able to follow your story so easily. It is emotional and so good. Keep up the good work and never stop writing!!
The repetition of the word suburbia truly exemplifies the feeling of this poem. I truly enjoyed reading it and believe that this poem is beautifully written and packed full of meaning. Continue to write you truly have a gift!
AB,
Your poem brings great awareness to those growing up with these adversities. You open up about mental illness about perception within oneself and the upbringing of poor parenting. This is something unfortunately many people face. It is saddening that the majority of kids in the neighborhood faced the same and similar struggles due to their parents. I am sure in a bittersweet way it made you guys closer. Having a group that understands and relates, allows you to feel less alone, but at the same time it is sad this is what you had to relate to besides the similar music and dreams of another place. I am so sorry for that. I am also sorry about the end of your relationship. Unfortunately relationships end due to many reasons such as compatibility, life circumstances, and other factors. I know that doesn’t always make it feel better, but it is a good reminder that it is not always your own fault for it ending. Relationships can also be a learning experience for people to work on themselves.
Thank you for sharing such a touching and honest poem. It shows how there is so much more beneath the surface. Appreciate the honesty
Dear AB:
Thank you for sharing this story-like poem about your memories of growing up and the adversities you faced. It is written in such a frank and simple style which is touching and relatable. I am glad you found love. the last lines,
“But it wasn’t meant to be, or at least that’s what you told me, as you drove me home, out of your suburbia.
But that’s life in suburbia; where it’s fun to play until the end of the day…”
show a true sense of irony . Thank you for sharing your poem.
“And the kid who used to play with guns until one day he got mad and then he got sad and then nothing at all.”
This is an amazing line I haven’t seen other commenters mention. A big part of poetry is saying much with few words, and this line nails it. The rhyming is also a nice touch.
I love the dichotomy you have going on between the children and the parents. I think the difference in language and power of tone seeps through this poem in a delicate yet strong way. Linking it all through the suburbs is an interesting twist that I don’t see often but works so genuinely here. I think of how often movies and television show the suburbs in an idyllic or dystopian setting. This poem adds so much complexity to that experience.
Thank you for sharing your poem! It was so beautiful to read and personally made me feel very nostalgic about how people grew up from our childhoods.
This poem felt like a song, and the repeated use of the word suburbia was very smart. The story you tell is very fascinating, and it is very well written
I love how you display the good and bad of living in suburbia. This reminds me of my experiences when I was younger and living in this environment. It shows how the setting of suburbia affects a person’s upbringing and personality.
This poem flows very nicely! I like how you brought up common issues that are present in many people’s lives to draw attention to the lifestyle and systematic changes that are needed.
Great poem AB,
I like the narrative and repetition of the word suburbia. I like that you use very descriptive words to explain how life in the suburbs is different and complicated compared to those who grow in larger cities. It can involve lots of gossips, drama and turmoil.
I’d like to hear more from you an your stories.
I love the way this was structured and how/where it rhymed. It flowed really well, and told a really interesting story. I like how you brought to light what living in suburbia is really like. I think it tends to get romanticized a lot, when in reality my experience is similar to yours. I really love the line “But that’s life in suburbia; where the kids aren’t all right, and the parents all fight”. I also loved how smoothly it transitioned to a more personal story. I feel like the kids in those poem are just looking for love and escape from the life that their parents have. There’s a sort of nostalgia I get from reading this poem. It was very well written and flowed more like a story than a poem.
I enjoyed your poem so much! Thank you for highlighting both the good and bad aspects of suburbia. The repetition really left an impact on me and the imagery was very well written. Good Job!
I really enjoyed this. I like how you brought up the images that people portray– that they have a perfect, suburban family that has no issues, when in actuality they’re sleeping apart, and fighting, and other things. You turn a phrase really well and make choices beyond just the immediate, obvious one which I really appreciate. I also appreciate the references and allusion to musicians, etc. without actually naming the band (ex. saying Kurt instead of Nirvana). Really enjoyed this poem!
This is a really unique poem and I felt like you brought be through a whole story with just a few stanzas. You were able to pull this sort of melancholic and nostalgic feeling from your past that I think people would definitely be able to relate to. Love this style.
To AB- The topic of suburbia is always an interesting thing to talk about. When you think about it it’s really like a simulation. There are so many things that try to get covered up with a place like this because the people there just want to live their “perfect lives,” even though most of it is a front. Your poem really shows how relatable topics like this are but not many people talk about it. I like the ending of your poem “But that’s life in suburbia; where it’s fun to play until the end of the day…” it shows just how no matter what happens on the outside no one really knows what happens on the inside. So many things get hidden within towns like this, and many things will forever go unknown because in suburbia it’s not ok to talk about things like that. This is such a unique poem so thank you for sharing and allowing us to open our minds about these topics.
I loved you structured your poem, the narrative storytelling was well done. By weaving in the actions of others as well as the suburbia setting, there were good breaks and parallel actions which made the poem more dynamic. Well done!