Poems

I succeed
I rise
I fly with the birds
I swim with the fishes
I hustle with the devil
I live with God
My back is scarred
My hands are hurt
My feet are ice
My sweat is money
Green is me
But far from it
I like girls that play at night
I like mothers that feel me
I meet your whole family
And make them believe

Yesterday I got outta bed
Nothing seemed to be wrong except the fact that if had been 2 days since you called
I kept making sure that…

My phone was on…

And I don’t wanna come to the conclusion
That me and you were an illusion
Cause it would be something that I don’t think that I could handle
VERY WELL!!

I want to love!
No more pain!
I wanna hear you callin’ out my name.
I want fairytales. No more rain!
I’m ready, do you feel the same?
Because I can’t stop! Won’t stop! Till I get what I want.
Baby all that I want is you.
I want love.

It started with a little hole in my heart.
Running around in dirty diapers, wishing it was food instead of rats
In the house with momma, wishing the crying would stop
But she don’t know about the pain growing in my heart.

As I get older the pain get uncontrollable
Wishing I was in the center of my mother’s arms while she reads my favorite book to me
But instead she’s doing a double shift at a restaurant when she should had went to school from the start
Because she don’t know about the paining hole that’s halfway in the center of my heart

People teasin’ me because they see disbelief in my eyes
But all along it’s tearful, tired eye, waiting for the painful hole to stop growing in the center of my heart

Now I am older, so momma gave me money, food, clothes, but still no family to love
Until one day, mom quit her job and can come home and she couldn’t give me no money, food, or clothes, just a hug
All it took was a hug and the painful hole stop growing above

Life is hard
but I got to thank God
for letting me live
and all these years
and all the tears I’ve cried
I should be dead
but I’m alive
Thank You Allah

Saturday, Saturday, Saturday,
I remember when I would wake
Every Saturday and look outside
To see those cars go by.
Every Saturday I would say
“I speak no English”
To everybody that was in the house,
I remember waking up every Saturday to the smell of my mother’s food,
No lie I miss being home every
Saturday.

I am “most talented” when I am:
Being inspired,
I am “most likely to succeed” when I am:
Out of trouble and doing the right thing,
I am “best looking” when I am:
Always getting outside the house,
I am “class clown” when I am:
Under the influence of drugs,
I am “best dressed” when I am:
Going out,
I am “best dancer” when I am:
That’s a lie,
I am “most friendly” when I am:
Sober and when I’m out with people,
I like myself best when I am:
Sober.

Picture life in my shoes
What would you do?
17 years old
Dropped out of high school
Got a child
Yes! A daughter
Your daughter so precious
Baby momma askin’ questions
Wanna know all your confessions
Wanna know why her daughter’s father always got her stressin’
But life is just a lesson
A lesson untold
So even you live and you learn
Or you’ll crash and burn
Going down a one way to hell
And there’s no U-turn
You gotta feel me homie
I mean it’s only right
When da curtains close,
Fade to black
Your vision is all white
LIFE

Like a moth captured, I remain confined
While those looking in are unable to set me free
My freedom’s revoked, when I speak I choke
I try to talk, but my words simply flee
My once beautiful wings are becoming brittle
My fragile body’s becoming sore
The windows to my soul are clouded with despair
My gentle heart is now torn
I look for a helping hand in these times
No one to rescue me from my stress
Claustrophobic I am in this jar
Lack of ventilation’s causing me to lose my breath
Each day I fight to survive and conquer this tragedy
I’m slowly losing my strength
By tomorrow, I’ll be dead and gone
After years of fighting a battle I couldn’t win

Dark fields of dismay
Before my eyes lie my shattered dreams and goals
Disappointment swims within
Motionless I stand as if time has frozen
No perception of direction
Everything’s so peculiar
No illumination, no friends, or joy
This place seems so familiar
No gleeful moments to obtain
Happy days and fun are now done
Solitude I must return to
Alone I am again, with nowhere to run

In the midst of seclusion
Weary and worn out
Torn and bewildered
Permeated with self-doubt
Fearful to submit
Too strong to fold
Careless of gaining anything
Too worried I’ll lose my soul
Caged in my mind
Afraid to allow my thoughts to be free
The doors are shut tight
Trapping the boy that lives inside of me
When he cries, I cry
Because we are the same
Two souls in one body
Sharing this mutual pain