Forgiveness

By AF

Learning to forgive can be difficult in the beginning when you are not used to forgiving.
But when you learn to forgive a person for mistreatment, hurt or pain, or maybe it
Could be forgiven that person for their past decision or decisions that you may despise.

Whichever it maybe you will feel a lot better about yourself, improve your character and learn
To appreciate life’s tribulations and strife, because each 1 we learn from and become wiser and stronger.

A few years back I learned to forgive my father, which I did over the phone.
It had come to me one night that people only do what they know how to do.
My father wasn’t able to be a good father figure, because he was not taught how to be one.
Nor did he experience the things a good father teaches their child, so he wasn’t able to display fatherly qualities.

I felt real good to get it off of my chest, that it allowed my father and I to develop a solid friendship.
Growing up I would’ve never believed one day I would forgive him.

But there is 1 person I wish I would have forgiven before she passed away
Last year, it was the lady who raised me, my grandma.
I drove her crazy with my criminal lifestyle,
Truly I regret it.

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58 Comments

  1. Kayla on October 18, 2022 at 11:02 PM

    I related to this poem a lot. My mom and I have an extremely rocky relationship, where she struggles with alcoholism and takes it out on me. I love her so dearly and one day I’ll be able to forgive her and I’m building towards that goal to forgive her. I am so glad you were able to forgive your father, I think it takes remembering that they have a past that has affected them and they struggle with their own inner demons, just like us. It’s hard to see past your own biases when forgiving someone and its still hard for me, but you’ve reminded me to do it before its too late and you also reminded me do think of their demons, so thank you.

  2. HL on October 20, 2022 at 3:42 PM

    Hi AF! Your poem was really emotionally impactful and packed full of profound life lessons, equal parts heartwarming and heartbreaking. It illustrates not only your astonishing personal growth as a person, but also your innate sense of free-verse poetic structure. The fact that you learned how to forgive your father despite the hardships you faced together is truly eye-opening and leaves a warm fuzzy feeling in me while reading it, knowing that the past was left in the past and you and your father were able to move forward and forge a close relationship. Of course regret is a deep, difficult emotion to grapple with, and the pain of losing a loved one is hard to bear, but I’m confident you will be able to find forgiveness for yourself and your grandma in the same way you forgave your father, because regardless of circumstances, family members love each other unconditionally, no matter what, though the rough times and the good times. This poem was incredibly cathartic to read, and the fact that you’re channeling these strong emotions through beautifully written poetry makes for a very rewarding reading experience. Please keep up writing like this!!

  3. Halie on October 20, 2022 at 5:28 PM

    Forgiving is very hard to do specifically when somebody so close to you or you loved is the one you have to forgive. But forgiving feels good knowing you can finally just let what happened be in the past. Amazing job telling the story and tapping into that emotion.

    • Shelby on February 2, 2023 at 3:59 PM

      This is a really good poem, and I love the level of honesty and maturity expressed in this poem. To understand that your father lacked the skills to be a father because he was never taught them by his father is very insightful. I know what it’s like to have a parent who doesn’t really know how to be a parent. I’m still struggling with the forgiveness part on that one and it’s really inspiring to read that not only did you forgive your father, but you went on to develop a friendship with him. Thank you for being willing to share this with the world, and I hope you can continue this path of forgiveness with others in your life you may need it. Forgiveness is a powerful thing, for all involved.

  4. KC on October 21, 2022 at 2:31 PM

    AF,

    Thank you for your vulnerability. It takes a lot of self-awareness and grace to forgive those that hurt us. I admire you for this! Keep writing!

  5. Jaxson Pawlowski on October 23, 2022 at 1:59 PM

    This is a great story and amazing writing for a powerful purpose; teaching us to forgive and why. I am glad you got to reconnect with your father, it hit home for me because I grew up mostly without my father so I worry for any future children that I may not know how to be a father but I don’t want them to suffer for it.

    I think forgiveness is a powerful skill we possess as humans and more powerful than most realize! Again, great writing, and I hope more people can learn to forgive!

    ~JP

  6. Mackenzie Curry on October 23, 2022 at 2:54 PM

    Hi AF!
    This poem was truly inspiring, and I felt as if I learned a lot from this. As someone that has a lot of people screw me over, I believe I need to learn how to forgive just as you did. I never realized how impactful forgiving someone is for yourself. I liked how it was short yet to the point and I knew exactly what you were trying to say. I really appreciate you letting me able to read this. Usually, poetry doesn’t have this sort of impact on me, but this poem really impacted me and the way I am going to go about the rest of my thought processes. Please continue to write poems you have no idea how powerful they really are and who they can really help!

  7. Conor Thompson on October 23, 2022 at 4:16 PM

    Hey AF I really loved the poem that you have created here! Forgiveness is a big thing for me in my family especially the times we are living in now. You are speaking here with such passion and in such inspiration for just something that is a basic need for our society. People now a days are just very frustrated for no reason whatsoever. I hope you continue writing poems, you are doing such a great job!

  8. Jill on October 23, 2022 at 4:59 PM

    I really liked this poem and how told a strong message. Forgiveness is often hard for many people but we cannot hold a grudge forever. Although it may be hard forgiving those around us can lift the weight off of our shoulders and create peace within ourselves which can make it easier to heal moving forward. Great job and keep up the great work!

  9. Alexis on October 23, 2022 at 6:23 PM

    AF,

    I love and appreciate your mindset about forgiveness. As people, it can be hard to forgive when someone has done us wrong and impacted us negatively, but we have to ask ourselves if the grudge we hold towards those is worth it. As you say in your poem, forgiving is not just for the other parties but also for ourselves. Whether we forgive and include the person in our life again, or forgive to clear the air, it makes us feel better within. You mention how forgiveness is a sign of strength, and I agree with you completely about how it helps us grow as people and relief that anger we have. I enjoyed reading your personal story on this topic too. I am so proud of you for being able to forgive your father after what he put you through in your life. Not many people can reason with why someone treated them wrongly, but you understand why he wasn’t able to be the solid father figure you needed. Although it may not fix what he has done to you, you still are able to understand this is the best he could do. Forgiving him has relieved a lot of tension for the both of you it seems and I am happy to read you guys have a solid bond now, even if it wasn’t easy in the beginning. On the other hand, I am truly sorry to hear about the regret of the situation with your Grandma. I may not know your grandma or the exact situation, but I have a feeling she may have had a mindset like your own, and know you would’ve wanted to clear the air with her someday. I am sure someday, somewhere, somehow this tension will be relieved for you as well.

  10. Emily on October 23, 2022 at 10:05 PM

    I’m glad you were able to forgive. You’re very right , forgiveness is hard. It’s hard to forgive someone who hurt you or a loved one. The poem actually felt more like a speech to me rather than a poem. But I like it. The only thing I don’t like is the uppercase c in Change. All of the other lines are lowercase when it is apart of a phrase.

  11. Julia Santosuosso on October 23, 2022 at 11:08 PM

    Thank you so much for sharing your work. These words are so important to hear and spread genuinely. So many people move about their lives in such a strong state of anger or resentment towards one or more people in their lives rather than focusing on how that may impact them and their own character/actions. And what you said about truly feeling better about yourself once you learn to forgive others, I completely agree. I also feel as though forgiving others just allows me to feel better about the world and my life altogether. All in all I am so happy that I was able to find your poem because I think we all need this reminder somethimes. Thank you once again.

  12. Grace on October 24, 2022 at 10:27 AM

    I really loved your poem – I resonated with it with my own past experience and you were able to articulate your feelings in a clear, poetic way. Thank you for writing it 🙂

  13. Paul on October 24, 2022 at 4:14 PM

    Forgiveness is amazing. I’m sorry you didn’t get to apologize to your grandmother. Seek happiness in the relationship you are rebuilding.

    Thank you for sharing.

  14. Tiff on October 25, 2022 at 10:56 AM

    Forgiveness, both of others and of ourselves, is such a powerful thing and sometimes we don’t realize it until we suffer loss. Your grandma would be so proud of you for looking inward and allowing your heart to learn forgiveness so try not to let the burden of regret weigh you down like an anchor. Thank you for your beautiful and touching words!

  15. EH on October 25, 2022 at 4:16 PM

    AF,

    You seem to have an incredible perspective on life. Many people like to call themselves forgiving, but most, myself included, would draw a line somewhere, because that’s ‘easier’ than forgiving those who truly hurt us. It takes immense will power to be the first one to reach in the way that you did with your father, and that truly puts a smile on my face reading of your re-built relationship. It’s heartbreaking to read of your grandmother, but I’d personally like to believe that her soul might feel your forgiveness and love for her, and that she is at peaceful rest seeing you turn everything around for the better. You’ve made me think twice about my own life and relationships, & I thank you for that.

  16. Prince Arora on October 26, 2022 at 2:50 PM

    The poem definitely resonated with me as we try to carry grudges and it is very difficult to forgive a person who has wronged you but having a reason that this is what they know best is an amazing pov to make peace and move on. Thanks for this.

  17. Meghan on October 27, 2022 at 11:31 AM

    I really enjoy the layout and organization of this poem. I like how you described what forgiveness is in the first stanza, then how you gave an example about your father and your grandma. As a reader, I feel the emotion and sadness in your poem which is a really good writing element. Just know that your grandma is looking down at you from heaven, and watching you change yourself into a better person!

  18. Ainsley on October 27, 2022 at 3:05 PM

    Hi AF,
    I loved reading this poem. I think the message it sends about learning to forgive no matter how difficult it may be, and how forgiving makes a difference for not only the person being forgiven, but yourself. I know from experience as someone who held grudges for a very long time that eventually, holding these grudges and feeling so negatively towards others begins to cause you to feel negative and even angry. I really enjoyed hearing about how you were able to find it in yourself to forgive your father, and the way you were understanding of why he lacked in certain aspects. I think something we often forget as people is that we may not see the people we’re fighting with again, and to consider if that grudge is worth holding, or if forgiveness is on the table. I’m so sorry to hear about your grandmother, but I’m happy you were able to forgive your father in time to repair and maintain your relationship. Thank you so much for sharing,
    Ainsley

  19. ken on October 30, 2022 at 4:46 PM

    Thank you so much for opening up to us and telling us about your past. This message is so powerful. It is very difficult to forgive people but once you do you feel a weight lifted off of you! This was such a good poem. Readers can really feel what you were feeling when you wrote this. It is so powerful and meaningful to you and I appreciate you writing about it. Keep up the GREAT work and never stop writing!!

  20. Lucy Elliott on November 2, 2022 at 12:55 PM

    Very honest and raw. Appreciate the emotions and growth. Keep writing and growing!

  21. Abigail Walsh on November 8, 2022 at 11:50 AM

    This poem tells a story and leaves a powerful message about forgiveness. It starts out with a clear message showing the difficulty of forgiving which sets out the message as more powerful for the author forgiving their father. Being able to forgive their father shows the importance of forgiveness and the impact on their life. The line that growing up they never believed they could do this shows the importance of a relationship with family and shows forgiveness as a strong family value. The last line about regret sticks with the reader and evokes emotion. This poem is very well done giving the reader a story and life lesson.

  22. Samantha Haviland on November 8, 2022 at 10:09 PM

    Hello there, I enjoyed reading your poem. I think your writing displays how difficult it is to forgive a person who was supposed to be there for us throughout our lifetime, like a parent. In some ways it is impossible to raise a child without screwing them up in some way, yet sometimes parents are absent in a way that scars us permanently. As far as your grandmother, I believe she knew that you loved her, despite the way that you may or may not have showed it. I think her stepping in to help raise you shows that. Nice job.

  23. Natalia on November 13, 2022 at 11:30 PM

    As I read this poem, I found myself being very reflecting from the impact your writing has on me as a reader. I cannot relate to this specific scenario, but myself and a large audience can understand the idea of forgiveness and how important it is. I found I related to your idea that “people only do what they know how to do.” I think this is true for every person and it can be very hard to understand and live with at times and can take a long time to come to this conclusion in relationships. But this does not make our feeling invalid or wrong. The most important part of these feelings is the reflection and forgiveness afterwards as you have put into words in this poem.

  24. Janashya Napier on November 14, 2022 at 10:25 PM

    I absolutely agree with this poem, forgiveness can be hard for some people and when you’re ready to forgive it be too late.

  25. Kristen Shave on November 16, 2022 at 1:27 PM

    I love this poem! A possible modification could be changing “1” to “one”. There is lots of emotion built up within this poem and you can feel it in each line. Forgiveness is a difficult concept to capture, but I feel you did it well. Great work!

  26. McKenzie Gordon on November 17, 2022 at 11:52 AM

    I think this is an essential message, and I love how you put it. It is touching yet persuasive. I love the relation to a personal event.

  27. Crystal E. on November 20, 2022 at 10:42 AM

    Your poem Forgiveness is beautifully written and speaks to the regrets we all experience in life when it comes to managing family relationships. My sincere condolences on the loss of your grandmother. I sense that this poem will reach her and that you are forgiven.

  28. Victoria on November 20, 2022 at 2:15 PM

    I love the honesty that you exhibit within this poem. Forgiveness can be truly excruciating, difficult beyond belief. But when you allow yourself to forgive, the lightness that overtakes you is nearly impossible to describe, and you articulated that so well.

  29. Devyn Payne on November 22, 2022 at 10:27 AM

    To forgive someone is honestly a hard pill to swallow. Especially when you have grown to resent and hate them for so many years. However, to read and hear your story I was able to see you overcome an obstacle and let forgiveness consume you rather than hatred for another.

  30. Nicholas on November 24, 2022 at 3:31 PM

    A genuinely emotional piece of art. Forgiveness can be easy said than done. Doing so can make us better people than we were before. Fueling ourselves with hatred and anger should not be a viable life option. If we live with such negative energy, we will regret the moments we could’ve chosen to forgive each other before it’s too late.

  31. Al on November 27, 2022 at 12:00 PM

    Thank you for sharing your poem, it was so inspirational! I liked how forgiveness was the main focus and the emphasis on how hard it is to forgive people, but eventually we need to learn how to.

  32. Pratham on November 27, 2022 at 5:20 PM

    This poem was a reality check for me. After reading this poem, I can think of many instances where I should forgive people. It also provided me with new insight, which I appreciate a lot. This poem hit very deep, so thank you for writing it.

  33. Brielle on November 28, 2022 at 1:22 AM

    It’s very admirable that you were able to forgive your father because you were able to put yourself in his shoes and see from his perspective why he struggled with being a father figure in your life. It takes a lot of self awareness and shows great growth!

  34. Monte Weaver on November 28, 2022 at 12:24 PM

    Your character is bright. Your heart is strong. Our ancestors are never gon AC, just passed on somewhere else. You can always talk to her, you must find her spirit and connect with her. Believe me she is guiding you, you just have to pay attention to the little things. Keep writing poetry as your story will help others truly forgive! It is one of the hardest things to do but your story has allowed me to forgive my mother. Thank you.

  35. Emily D. on November 29, 2022 at 11:36 AM

    Hello AR,
    To forgive someone does take a long and hard time to finally do, however I think once you finally do it lifts a weight of your shoulders and helps you feel slightly better. It was so good to see that you over came the grudge and let the forgiveness in. You captured the idea of forgiveness exquisitely in the poem.

  36. Lynn on December 7, 2022 at 1:37 PM

    Hi, Your poem was really powerful and I understood where you were coming from as I read it. Learning to forgive people for things they’ve done can be hard at first but once you get more comfortable doing it life starts to feel a little bit better. Most of the time I don’t just forgive people for them I forgive them for myself. Holding on to not forgiving and disliking someone will only make you feel worse. So it’s better to put yourself first forgive and learn from that experience. I enjoyed your poem and you did amazing writing it. I hope to read more from you!

  37. Allison R. on December 30, 2022 at 10:44 PM

    This is a very impactful poem. Forgiveness can be hard sometimes, especially if you know the other person was truly in the wrong. Personally, I struggle with forgiveness because I can be a bit stubborn at times. However, like you said, forgiveness can set you free. You also want to be able to offer that forgiveness before it becomes too late. I am sorry for the loss of your grandmother and how you were unable to forgive her before she passed away. Your personal story did a fantastic job arguing your point. I hope you continue to write because this was a great poem!

  38. Aniyah on January 27, 2023 at 2:33 PM

    AF, this is a beautiful poem. I can relate to this poem because I have a rocky relationship with my father. My dad did not grow up with a lot of father qualities from his father, just like your dad. My dad is a lot like my grandfather. Growing up and up until now, my dad has done horrible things towards me and everyone else, like lying and gaslighting. I forgive him for everything, but I will never forget anything that he has done. Forgiveness gives me peace. Keep up the good work 🙂

  39. eleni on January 28, 2023 at 11:37 PM

    Forgiveness is so important but so difficult to achieve. When someone has done something to hurt you, it is often difficult to see their side of things or to step back and try to see why they may have acted the way they did. I think the situation described in this poem is something many people can relate to, myself included. A parent is someone who is supposed to protect you and care for you, so betrayal is often more hurtful when it comes from a parent. However, the author was able to find it within themselves to forgive their father for his behavior because they were able to reflect on why he acted the way he did. In the long run, it helped their relationship blossom, which is such a great lesson! Forgiveness brings about such a peaceful feeling because for one to truly forgive, they must let go of the anger and sadness they feel. A very powerful poem!

  40. Jocelyn Patterson on January 30, 2023 at 4:49 PM

    This poem is amazing and very relatable. I understand that forgiveness takes a lot and it’s really great that you were able to do that and move past to become a bigger and more mature person. I think that you should be very proud of yourself for being able to get to this point because I am sure you hold resentment and anger as well, I know that I would. I also think that it’s really good because you are now able to possibly not hang onto that negativity so much anymore. I am also very close with my grandmother she is my mom to me so I understand how you feel and I think it’s important that you can know how much she meant to you.

  41. lauren on February 6, 2023 at 3:18 PM

    This poem was beautifully written and emotionally charged. This poem opened my eyes and taught me to look at life from a perspective of forgiveness and acceptance rather than resentment and bitterness. I failed to look beyond someone’s wrongdoings and have empathy for those who only know hatred and pain. The lines about your father were so touching. Forgiveness is incredibly difficult, especially when forgiving someone who has hurt you deeply. I admire your growth and vulnerability. Thank you for this meaningful, bittersweet piece!!

  42. Corrina Obernesser on February 6, 2023 at 7:01 PM

    This poem is so strong! Learning to forgive is one of the hardest life lessons to learn. Not too long ago I had a close friend of mine betray me. I am learning to forgive her because of the past we have, but it is hard to let something go when it hurts you. I agree that forgiveness helps you learn about your character and develop further upon yourself. I’m so glad you were able to forgive your father. It is important to understand what he went through as a child which contributed to how he treated you growing up. Not receiving the proper fatherly love a boy needs can change someone’s entire life. I hope you can learn to forgive yourself for driving your grandmother crazy with your lifestyle. Thanks so much for sharing.

  43. Mitchell on February 6, 2023 at 8:55 PM

    AF, I really enjoyed reading this poem and your opening up your feelings and transitioning them into words, It takes a lot of self-awareness and grace to forgive those that hurt us. During your poem I liked how you mention how forgiveness is a sign of strength, and I agree with you completely about how it helps us grow as people and relief that anger we have.

  44. Bryan W. on February 10, 2023 at 11:53 AM

    This is very insightful. Learning to forgive and realizing that people can only do what they know how to takes wisdom. Forgiving others can be incredibly difficult, forgiving ourselves even more so. This piece shows self-reflection and growth. Very enjoyable to read.

  45. Vatsal on February 11, 2023 at 1:42 AM

    AF,
    I am sorry for your loss. I hope that you are better now. I agree with your idea of showing forgiveness to others. Your poem does a great job showing the impact that regret can have on a person’s life. Forgiveness is not an easy thing to do and your poem does a good job of explaining it. Also, your poem goes straight to the point and explains the meaning very well.

  46. Matthew Handley on February 12, 2023 at 12:48 PM

    I really appreciate your vulnerability that you display in this poem, and I can truly relate to it. Growing up, my father and I had an awful relationship, but when I allowed myself to open my heart back up to him I realized that he too was suffering just as much as I was. Forgiveness is hard, but nobody is perfect and people make mistakes. Your ability to open your heart again will open up a whole new future full of love and warmth and memories. I sorry about the guilt that you feel for your grandmother, but know that she loved and appreciated you. Thank you for this wonderful poem, and I hope to read another work from you in the future!

  47. Nicole on February 12, 2023 at 2:43 PM

    Hi AF,
    I just wanted to state how relatable your poem is and how applicable it can be in life. It brings the reader to understand both sides of the story, those who forgive and for those who are forgiven. Your vulnerability in this poem not only validates your own emotions towards your father and grandmother but enhances the sense of empathy towards them. I appreciate how you wrote how a phone call mended your forgiveness towards your father as it shows that something so simple as picking up the phone can conclude the difficult choice of forgiving.

  48. kayla on February 12, 2023 at 11:19 PM

    This poem was so well written. This story behind it was so thought-provoking and made me reflect on my own life. Thank you so much for writing and great job!

  49. AR on February 14, 2023 at 8:42 AM

    HI!
    this poem is really touching and well written, i also relate a lot to this poem about having a rocky relationship with my father, he has never really been there for me he left me when i was 10, now im 20. its truly heartbreaking falling out with a parent. forgiveness is a really hard thing to do and learn, alot of people are really stubborn. we all should learn to forgive people at some point because we are all humans.

    your mistakes do not define you my friend you live and learn. im sure your grandma is proud of you and proud that you admitted your wrongs

  50. Dulce on February 19, 2023 at 11:38 PM

    Forgiveness is something that can be very hard but at the same time it takes away that weight we carry. I appreciate your mindset about forgiveness. This poem tells a story and leaves a powerful message about forgiveness. Thank you for sharing your poem, it was so inspirational.

  51. Peter Zhang on March 3, 2023 at 10:54 PM

    Forgiving someone can be hard at first, but it can make you feel better and help you learn and grow. The person you forgive might have done something wrong, but you can still forgive them and move on. It’s important to remember that people might not know how to be good or do the right thing if they weren’t taught. Forgiving someone can help you become closer and develop a better relationship. It’s also important to forgive people before it’s too late, like if they pass away.

  52. Kay on March 20, 2023 at 12:14 AM

    This was a really emotional and striking poem that you wrote. I think the way you focused on one person at first but at the end transitioned to discussing another person in your life who had passed really tied the whole power of the poem together. Being able to admit that you have faults that you regret is an important trait to anyone’s character. Thank you for this poem!

  53. Grace on March 21, 2023 at 12:59 PM

    Hi there! I really enjoyed reading this poem and it made me think of a quote that I have saved in my camera roll, one that I pass by all the time without thinking about it. “Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.” It takes a strong and mature person to forgive those around them who have caused hurt, confusion, and sadness. You should be proud of yourself for finding it in your heart to forgive and to realize that it would set you free and allow you to start fresh, not for others around you, but for yourself. There have been many times in my own young life that I have had to take a step back and remember that while feelings of anger, hurt and confusion may be completely justified at points, my relationships with others are sometimes more important. Allow yourself to feel your feelings and allow them to pass by. I’m glad that you have found peace in your relationships, and I wish the best for you and your family.

  54. Jenna on March 22, 2023 at 1:53 PM

    I really enjoyed your poem. It is very touching because the reader can connect to it. It was very relatable.

  55. RB on March 27, 2023 at 1:00 PM

    Forgiving and asking for forgiveness can be hard for me as I tend to hold grudges. This poem was really touching and emphasized the importance of this quality. “It had come to me one night that people only do what they know how to do.” was one of my favorite lines. I think we tend to judge people harshly and it is important to remember to treat everyone with kindness.

  56. Giorgio Juve on April 2, 2023 at 10:44 PM

    This poem was admirable and relatable. Forgiveness is a hard thing to overcome. It lets go of the pain and can be good for your health. It can help us become better people overall and can lead to more positive relations. I hope that you can forgive your grandma and create a better lifestyle for yourself. This was a great poem and I hope you continue to write more.

  57. A. on April 16, 2023 at 11:46 PM

    The pain you share with your poem can be felt through the words. I’m sorry life has turned out this way for you, but it has allowed you to create something beautiful. I’m sure your grandma would forgive you and is proud of you from heaven.

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