Poem: “Victorious”


I’m sittin’ here chillin, thinkin’

about the past. All the stuff I’ve been

through, some thought I wouldn’t last.

I’m still standing, I’ve overcome

many obstacles, I see

success and I smell it all in my nostrils.

It’s mandated, this thing is

like non-optional, something to push

against when these haters insist on knockin’

you! Aggressively pressin’ forward you

can’t ignore it, finessin’ you lyrically 

can’t help but support it. I’m in

a lane of my own and I can’t be

topped. I’m standin’ firm like a pillar

and yes I’m as strong as an ox.

So versatile that I can’t be stuffed in a box.

My views are universal, no longer

left in the dark. Can’t be afraid or timid,

gotta be sure, keep raisin’ the bar

because I know I’m deserving of more.

I’ma keep on knockin’ until they open

the door and see what’s arrived

watch their chins drop to the floor.

Yeah, I made it, endured what you could bring.

I’m tested and tried so give me my champion’s ring.

I dare to dream so I see the best

is yet to come. I’m about to rise,

and shine, just like the sun. Never been

one to run from a battle, I hold it down.

Toe to toe, blow for blow and round

for found. Divinely inspired I’m destined

for greatness indeed. If you can’t

seem to find the way, just follow my lead.

I’m on top, give me my props,

and home stand down. In case you don’t

notice partner, I’m the man now.


  1. Krystal on December 19, 2010 at 3:53 PM

    This poem is pretty amazing! I love the positivity for change and success, and the confidence you exude for claiming that success. Having a goal and succeeding in reaching that goal is certainly something you must not only dream about but something you must actually see as your reality, and then stand strong, immovable and undeterred, as you make your way to that reality. I sense in your poem this is exactly what you are doing. With this state of mind, you are and will continue to be victorious in overcoming the obstacles in your path. I really like the passage that your success is “mandated” and “something to push against” when you are being challenged by obstacles you “can’t ignore”. Continue to stand firm and at each victory, keep raising the bar for your success.

    In terms of the style and text, everything flowed well for me except the passage “Toe to toe, blow for blow and round for found.” I am curious whether you meant “round for round” and if not, what you mean by “round for found.” Perhaps an additional quick sentence could help clarify your meaning.

    Keep up the good work and stay strong!

  2. Shannon Rampe on January 13, 2011 at 12:51 PM

    This poem has a really powerful rhythm to it that got me going right away and carried me through to the end. The alternating rhyme scheme is punctuated by the brief phrasing that makes the poem feel like a rap, or like punches thrown in a boxing match. In fact, that boxing metaphor that’s explored later in the poem could be brought up near the top in order to front-load this idea in the reader’s mind as they’re reading the poem.

    I really enjoyed the concrete details used throughout the poem. The author could have just said vague things like “I’m going to be strong, I’m going to keep pushing ahead.” Instead, we get gritty, real details like “I smell it in my nostrils,” or “my champion’s ring.”

    Something that I found really interesting about this poem is that it makes extensive use of similes that could be called cliches: firm like a pillar, strong as an ox, rise and shine just like the sun, left in the dark, destined for greatness… If any one of these appeared in another poem, I would point at it and say that the author was leaning on the crutch of a cliche. But in this poem, where they’re strung together one after another like punches in a boxing match, it feels like its taking something tired and making it fresh and exciting. I really like it! I’ve got to give props to the author for breaking a rule and making it work.

    The very beginning of the poem is a little weak. A poem that is this powerful needs to start out strong. I would completely cut the first three lines, and start with that first image of still standing, smelling successin my nostrils.

    Definitely an exciting poem – it gets your blood pumping and your energy up. Normally when you read a poem, you expect it to be quiet and thoughtful. I was pleasantly surprised to find this to be a poem that was energetic and exciting.

  3. Reilly on May 5, 2021 at 2:23 PM

    Wow this is chilling! You are so powerful in your words and conviction in this poem. This poem motivated and empowered me through reading it. Wonderful job and I hope you continue writing!

  4. Rahul on October 23, 2023 at 1:53 AM

    The tone is one of self-assuredness and empowerment, and it encourages the reader to embrace their own inner strength and keep pushing forward towards their goals. The poem’s message of daring to dream and believing in one’s potential is both motivating and inspiring.

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