I Saw A Cloud
By AG
I saw a cloud pass by today
It reminded me of you
It was just one cloud out of many,
but out of all the clouds in the sky,
I saw it. It caught my eye and my eyes lingered
on it until it hid behind a bigger cloud
I knew it was there still, waiting a moment
before showing itself again
And there it was, with its gentle curves
and mysterious nature, one moment this shape, then the next moment another.
As the cloud passed by the sun,
it grew more bright and cheerful, but the further away it drifted, the darker it became.
It’s 4:38 now and you’re raining, and the sky is dark.
I SAW A CLOUD!
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Nice feel to this.
I really love how seamlessly the cloud passes from being a reminder of the person to being a representation or an embodiment of them. The shift from “It reminded me of you” to the line towards the end “It’s 4:38 now and you’re raining, and the sky is dark.” really gives the poem more dimensions. I know I’m kind of repeating myself but that second last line I just quoted is also such a stunning line just on it’s own. It’s simultaneously so matter of fact but also so beyond the ordinary. It holds both of these aspects in itself really well without feeling strained or forced. I think it will stick with me for quite a while.
This is beautiful. It makes me imagine missing someone who i wish i was near who I could hold and speak to but instead all i am left with is this cloud and the sky hoping that maybe they are somehow thinking of me. Keep writing
It is your nice poem. I like it. Title also suits to the poem. I like the writing style.
AG,
Beautiful poem and vivid writing style. Your poem not only shows how much you care about the person you’re writing about, but how love can change how you see the simplest things to remind you of that loved one.
I liked your poem. It showed that you can really imagine anything or anything could happen with just a cloud passing by.
AG,
This poem reminds me of another I read on this site, Biggest Fan by DJ (Trey). Their poem and yours remind me that the value of love does not rely on reciprocity. You watch this passerby cloud in awe & with amusement, you become invested in something that will continue on whether or not you’re concerned with it. Your poem also reminds me that love is not contingent on only witnessing the good in someone, but that it’s real when you can appreciate them for their flaws, for their rainy days. Thank you for giving me something to think about.
Hi AG,
I enjoyed reading your poem because it captured the joy of the small things. Sometimes, it truly is the smallest interactions that brighten our day or that stand out more than everything else. Your poem captures pure solitude as you watch the sky above you. Your line “I saw a cloud pass by today/it reminded me of you” was my favorite because it leaves the reader with many questions. You never shared who that special person was that you were thinking about, which was an amazing addition to the poem because it allows the reader to connect on a personal level and imagine somebody they could think about. I love how simple the moment is that you describe, yet so impactful and memorable at the same time. I also loved how you made time pass by showing that it started raining at some point and the sky was now dark. Really great imagery in this poem! Great work.
Best,
CB